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Texture makes gravy sexy, says Boulder couples therapist. By Karen Mitchell |
Gravy is inherently sensuous. And it's an extra, one of those extras some think is essential while others could do without it, says Susan Hubbard, Boulder psychotherapist who specializes in couples therapy and sexual issues.
Hubbard, who has created both a book and a seminar called "Spicing Up Your Sex Life: A Tasteful Guide for Ordinary People," attributes the arousing nature of gravy to its texture.
"It's so creamy and you have to keep it moving," she says. "You can just stand there and watch the gravy dripping off the ladle. It makes the whole plate a lot richer; it smoothes everything together with a better blend. There's a moisture that's necessary to the Thanksgiving meal that's supplied by the gravy."
"Gravy is to turkey and stuffing as massage oil, music and candles are to sex. These extras enhance the main course."
Susan Hubbard - psychotherapist
The basic ingredient for the meal is the turkey, while gravy is an enhancement. "Sex can be basic and unadorned, and pleasant when it's plain," Hubbard notes. "But there's more sensuousness and lusciousness to it when there are some extras. Extras in sex can be just lighting a candle or having music in the background to make it more personal. It doesn't mean people always want extras. They may just want a turkey sandwich."
We already have a vocabulary about food, one that's rich and comfortable, but we don't have one for sexuality, she says.
"The central themes with both food and sex are taste and appetite," Hubbard says. "These themes govern what kind of nourishment we seek. Gravy is to turkey and stuffing as massage oil, music and candles are to sex. These extras enhance the main course if you like them and detract if you don't. If you're really hungry you may want a big elaborate meal. But sometimes you just want a little snack."
On the surface, she adds, it's easy to make love or to make gravy.
"You don't need that many ingredients," Hubbard says. "But to create well prepared gravy or a quality sexual experience you really have to pay loving attention or the results can be lumpy, greasy, tasteless and disappointing."
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